Let's see if you can beat this!

[Racer Chris]

This is in the dumb and dumber category. A friend reminded me of this story today, one I would rather have never remembered. One time while getting ready to go to the track ,after some kind of service with the engine removed, I couldn't figure out why the engine wouldn't start. I had fuel at the pump jets, spark, etc., all the right stuff seemingly, but no fire. A weird symptom was a small puff coming from the carbs, but no suction when I cranked the engine. I was about to give up and pull a valve cover, but decided to try one more crank. Something caught, and next thing I saw was a lot of white fluffy stuff spewing out the muffler and the engine was running. I instantly knew that I had not removed the paper towels I had stuffed in the intakes while I had the manifolds off for engine removal. I had set the manifolds back on the engine while it was on the floor,and after my service I decided I could rebolt them and re-install the engine by raising the car a little higher, never thinking . D'oh! It didn't sink in even when a little white stuff came out of the carbs while I tried to get the thing running. I had the air filters off to help in the diagnosis. My little engine actually passed 4 half pieces of fuel soaked paper towel right through the heads and out the tail pipe. Incredible, huh?

Chris

[MASSIVE TYPE IV]

Now, thats a heavy breather!!! Damn, it was hungry..

I did the same thing once, but I actually left aluminum tape over the intakes, while doing an install into a beetle, never even noticed until I put my hand over the carb and felt no suction..

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Jake Raby
Raby's Aircooled Technology
www.aircooledtechnology.com

[CHA914]

THATS AWSOME! and really funny!

I know how easy it is to forget the little things when I have been wrenching for a while.

Thanks for the laugh

Tony

[kevin powers]

very funny, sooner in the garage than in the pits.

[Racer Chris]

I just heard a story today that beats my own, and it relates to a thread on the Type 4rum. I went to Frank Marratta's Auto Show in Hartford with my wife today to meet Len Cuccureddu. He has a Vintage Spyder with a RAT Type 4 and wanted me to discuss exhaust ideas for his car. While he and I talked, Mary wandered around the show for a while. After leaving Lenny we stopped to look at the only VW Beetle in the show that she saw. It was a nice original '67 and the owner was a nice former hippie type. We talked for a little bit and he related this story: A few years ago he and his wife travelled to Colorado in their '77 Bus to see Joe Cocker at a bar he owns there, as she is a big fan of his from way back. While there he decided to have an oil change done at Walmart (you should know better). The mechanic needed help finding the drain plug (can you guess where this story is going). The owner showed him the drain plug and also pointed out the filter screen that needed to be cleaned at the same time. As he watched from a safe distance the mechanic performed the simple service and proceeded to put everything back together. Just as the owner was about to comment on the need for care when tightening the bolt, the mechanic gave it a good tug with his wrench and sure enough, Bang! He broke the eye right off the pickup housing inside the motor, probably damaging the support bolt at the same time. Here this couple is on a nice vacation a coupla thousand miles from home and some numb nut goes and breaks their vintage Vee Dublyu van. Anyway the store manager tried to buy them off with three thousand dollars cash (mostly ones I bet). No dice! Walmart paid for their motel, a UHaul, and trailer for a one way trip to Connecticut, and for a new engine for their Bus when they got home. Total price - about $7500. Now that's one expensive oil change.
I wonder if they still do that at Walmart in Colorado?

Chris Foley

[kevin powers]

old hippie types have one thing thats better than a good mech.good kharma

[914URY]

Chris,
I posted my "Strange Oil Leak" in the Type4 Forum but here is another fuild leak story.

Back when I was in college and my 914 was my only transportation I had a strange gas leak.(Good thing they're not water cooled or I'd have a "Strange Water Leak" story too.)The morning after filling up the gas tank the night before, I was greeted with about 1/2" of gas on the driver'side floor. I freaked. I soaked it up using rolls of toilet paper taken from the dorm's bathrooms. I checked the hoses and everything was OK so pulled the tank out. I found that rust had developed at the felt pad which the tank sits on. The tank rests on this felt pad between the tank and the body. The pad is in the area above pedals. (kinda hard to explain) I found that the fresh air fan "box" that is under that little grill at the base of the windshield was not tight up against the body and the drain lines were clogged with leaves and crap. So when it rained the box would fill up with water-overflow and run down behind the tank-soaking the felt pad under the tank. And the tank rusted out in the same shape as the felt pad. Problem found. To solve the problem on a student income, I took a beer can (what else) and made a patch. Mixed up some bondo and globbed it over the whole area. Problem solved.

[Racer Chris]

That's definitely one rust problem I've never seen on a 914 before.
Chris

[Tom Notch]

Once when building an engine I ran across a potential problem. As I was cleaning up the work area after assmebling the 2017 T1, "complete ready to stuff in" done, I found a piston pin retainer snap ring laying on the bench. Ohh, Gee! Tear it back down to look at each and every pin only to discover that they were all installed! My brand new package of Berg snap rings had been packaged with 9 of them! errrrrgh. I always count now.

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Tom Notch
Tom's Old VW Home

[Bleyseng]

I once helped a friend do the brakes on his 65 bus. I did most of the work so I went to wash up while he put the wheels back on. We got about 6 blocks before both front wheels fell off! He finger tighten the lug nuts!
Same friend same bus... I rebuild the 1600 motor for him but he helped. He installed the pistons and cylinders when I wasn't around. The motor lasted about 1000 miles because he didn't install the wristpin keepers!
I quit letting him "help" me.
Geoff

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76 914 2.0L

[scrawl]

...how about not latching down the hood of your baja and having it fly off on the interstate at 3am...
oh, and your brother driving behind you swerves to miss it putting his s-10 into the jersey barrier and totalling it...

i STILL say its his fault he cant drive...

[MASSIVE TYPE IV]

How about installing an engine into a 914 with no clutch or pressure plate...I did that once!! it really sucked.

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Jake Raby
Raby's Aircooled Technology
www.aircooledtechnology.com

[914URY]

How about not torquing the wheel on and having come off going down the back stright. We can post these stories here but would we ever tell anyone that we had made these mistakes in person?

[dehaan914]

As we are talking dumb stories anyways, here's mine. Me and my buddies fixed a buggy and when we wanted to start the engine it only ran on two cilinders and we couldn't figure out why, we fiddled with the timing, the carbs, everything. Then we decided to take off the valvecovers, and guess what, one valve train dropped right out, forgot to torque the nuts down aaarrgghh, after we fixed it it ran lake champ

[LeeE]

I have a dumb leading to dumber story. 1973 914 2 liter, rebuilt the top end, decided to leave the short block alone. I forgot to tighten the distributor, oops...destroyed the drive gear (I keep it as a souvenir of stupidity) So, pull the engine for a rebuild, and as long as it's out, might as well have a friend fix the weak 2nd gear synchro in the trans. I finally got everything done, installed, lit the engine, ran great, ready for a test drive, 1st gear, and.. it backed up. He had put the ring gear on the wrong side, had 5 gears in reverse.I got to drive it very slowly about 3 miles, in reverse, which was the only forward gear, back to his house for a 15 minute fix. Too much fun!